Tag Archives: BDSM

BDSM lifestyle

BDSM Verbal and Non-Verbal Safe Words

In the world of BDSM play, things can get a bit tricky when it comes to communicating whether you like it or are comfortable with the scene, or if you want your dominant to ease up or stop entirely.

BDSM safe words should be short, simple and to the point, but in some scenes it may be important to for some non-verbal safe words. We’ll cover some of the basics of creating safe words and actions in the BDSM lifestyle.

Tips for Choosing a Safe Word

Those in the lifestyle who love getting extra kinky will want to have a safe word that is memorable for both partners. Make sure to have a conversation on what the safe word would be before the start of any scene. Try to use a word or phrase that is meaningful and easy to speak and that can be easily understood over groans, smacks, zaps or whatever sounds occur during play time.

Many choose words that don’t naturally come up in kink or sex scenarios, and food items are popular. Pineapples, bananas, apples and such are good choices. Some couples choose celebrity’s names as safe words, as they are unlikely to come up during sex for any other reason.

Choosing Non-Verbal Safe Words

Non-verbal safe words are essentially safe signals that serve as alternatives to safe words that most be voiced. They serve the same purpose, but they are a communication tool that is put in place for those into certain kinks like face sitting and or being gagged. Non-verbal cues are also useful for those who might have a hard time expressing their wants and needs during kink.

Common safe-signals include double-tapping their partners leg or head or shaking their head, and some may drop a held object like a small ball. If there are plans to include restrictive bondage, it’s a good idea to choose a non-verbal safe word that doesn’t involve those body parts.

In BDSM Play, Safe Word is a Must

Unless you and your partner are no-holds barred kinksters, having some type of safe word or safety signal in place is the best way to prevent issues and injury for all involved. While you may never feel the need to use it, having one in place can ease fears when playing a bit rough in the bedroom.

The Joys of BDSM

To most people, the idea of BDSM seems like a twisted way to love. Some have a perception that it is an activity meant for people who like to …

SAFE, SANE, AND CONSENSUAL – THE GOLDEN RULE OF THE BDSM LIFESTYLE

There’s nothing wrong with wanting a bit of kink in your sexual relationships and this is particularly the case in the BDSM lifestyle. While it’s not for everyone, even those involved in bondage, submission and dominance play have rules to…

HOW TO BECOME A DOMINANT IN THE BDSM LIFESTYLE

Dominant in the BDSM Lifestyle“50 Shades of Grey” has made the BDSM lifestyle more mainstream. As such, more people are exploring their sexuality and coming clean about their kinks and fetishes. If you have always wanted to be a dominant in the BDSM lifestyle, you may wonder what steps you need to take to make this happen. Here are a few of the steps you need to follow to become a dominant in this lifestyle. Determine What Kinks and Fetishes You Want to Explore Before you can become a dominant in the BDSM lifestyle, READ MORE

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Erotic Spanking Tips – How to Please Your BDSM Sub

There is no lack of ways to have a bit of naughty fun in the bedroom, and impact play is one of the top spontaneous ‘go to’s’ for bold and experimenting couples. While those experienced in the BDSM lifestyle may be accustomed to the concept of erotic spanking, the art of pleasing a partner while engaging in the act can be illusive. We’re here to assist with a few tips to ensure success and maximum satisfaction for all involved.

Head for the Rear…But Don’t Forget the Rest of the Body

Impact play is the term used by swingers and vanilla couples when discussing any form of impact on one’s body for sexual gratification purposes. Naturally, the rear end is a great starting point to explore any desire to find pleasure in the pain.

However, just about any part of the body can be the target zone for various forms of spanking, as the stimulation increases blood flow and can drive a routine sex session to an entirely higher plane of satisfaction. Maximize on this concept with attention to not only the butt but keep the nipples, groin and other sweet spots on the menu.

Hands, Paddles & Whips…Oh My!

There’s no need for expensive toys or massive forethought to get into impact play, but they can be a turn on that your sub just loves. Every instrument delivers a different sensation, but newbies will likely begin their erotic spanking journey with a hand. Those new to the experience, can also start small and use what they have handy around the home.

If both partners find it pleasurable, things can get a bit hotter and more intense with some toys common in the BDSM lifestyle like whips, floggers, and perhaps even pair the experience with some soft bondage implements.

Mix It Up: Alternate Between Spanks, Rubs & Squeezes

While spanking can be a divine experience in and of itself, it can be taken to a whole new level of sensations when the paddle zones are also caressed with rubs and squeezes. Mixing it up can establish a memorable and highly erotic spanking session. Change the shape of the hand, the speed and frequency and strength of these actions to keep things somewhat unpredictable for your sub and certainly more exciting.

Really Want to Know How Your Sub Gets Their Pleasure?

As with just about any situation involving a main partner or one in a swingers situation, the best way to find out what gets them off and heightens their pleasure is to ask! Communication is always the key, but do remember–subs love to be punished, so it’s okay to go off-script on occasion to discover other aspects of erotic spanking that are enjoyable but not yet realized.

A GUIDE TO BEING A SUBMISSIVE IN THE BDSM LIFESTYLE

submissives

Swingers who are comfortable with participating in the lifestyle sometimes find themselves digging a bit deeper into the kink to explore the BDSM lifestyle. While this type of sex play has been popularized by the 50 Shades of Grey series, there’s a lot more to dom/sub play done off the big screen. Typically, there’s no contract involved and submissives don’t give over full control per se. Let’s explore why subs love what they do and their daddy doms that provide them with both pain and pleasure. A Greater Feeling of READ MORE

You Want Me to Do What? A Guide to BDSM Swingers Boundaries

A bit of role play is well within the confines of the average swingers boundaries, but even those in the BDSM lifestyle typically have some limits. That’s the whole purpose …

SEXUAL DISCIPLINE IN THE SWINGERS & BDSM LIFESTYLE EXPLAINED

Whether you’re into swinging, BDSM, love being punished or are a mighty dom who appreciates keeping a submissive, the concept of discipline is nothing new to you. However, those just getting into the lifestyle of submissive/dominant relationships, will appreciate this…

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double penetration

Double Penetration – Explore A New Lifestyle Kink

If things get stale in the bedroom or it’s just time to try something new with your  partner, one of the most popular lifestyle kinks involves a sexual act called double penetration, or DP for short. However, DP isn’t just for those with an alternative lifestyle, as many people enjoy it as a part of their vanilla lifestyle with their monogamous partner.

Let’s explore what it is, what it involves and some tips for getting started with doubling up on sexual fun.

What is Double Penetration?

DP is the act of penetrating two openings in a sexual way, most typically the anus and the vagina. Double penetration can also involve inserting two body parts or sex toys into a single opening simultaneously. The versatile possibilities allow lifestyle couples to involve multiple partners or two people and a few toys—and can even be possible with one person with multiple toys or a dual-headed dildo.

Receiving penetration in the anus and vagina at the same time gives the receiver a feeling of fulness while creating a greater sense of tightness for the givers. This act can also stimulate the g-spot and the prostate for mind-blowing sexual pleasure.

Next, we’ll discuss what you need to proceed with DP and explore some tips for success.

Approaching & Preparing for DP With a Partner

When you’re ready to experiment with this type of play, there are a few key steps of ensuring a good time is had by all. It all starts with communication between participants. What are each person’s expectations, what do they want to experience, what are their fears, will others participate?

With those issues covered and a mutual agreement in place—including a safe word—it’s time to gather up the right tools for a comfortable and gratifying DP experience.

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How to Prepare for DP

Once rules have been set in place, get ready for the experience with a few tools of the trade. In addition to any protection against pregnancy or STD, one will want to get lots of body-safe silicone or water-based lube. Anyone wanting to use toys will need to let the receiver of the DP an array of sizes and shapes of phallic-like dongs and plugs to explore with solo before the first attempt at double penetration. If role playing, BDSM or other fantasies are to be acted out, obtain supplies to make it possible!

DP Starter Tips

Participants should begin with foreplay such as finger or toy insertion in one orifice before trying out two in order to loosen up the receiver and increase their comfort level for something larger. During the double penetration, several approaches can be explored. A vibrator and an anal plug or a partner’s member or a dildo attached to a harness are good starting points.

Some lifestyle couples introduce a second partner for MFM or FMF double penetration exploits. Remember, this can involve two insertions into one hole or a combination of both, so the possibilities with toys and other playmates open the doors for a whole world of exploration! Don’t forget that aftercare is a perfect way to end a DP session and encourage opportunities for future experiences.

Why Women Should Try Double Penetration Sex

Women have fantasies, which they want to act out in the bedroom. Double penetration is one of those fantasies. It can be both a man’s as well as a women’s …

WHY WOMEN PREFER A THREESOME WITH TWO MEN

Ever wonder why women prefer a threesome with two men? Many women love threesomes. There are many reasons why. In a threesome, two men will engage in sex with a single lady. The experience is so fulfilling to women…

16 POSITIONS FOR DOUBLE PENETRATION

Did you know there are 16 positions for double penetration? So, you are planning your first double penetration, but really you have no idea on how to do it? You must be asking yourself what position to use? What are the differences between positions, etc. Whether you are just interested to learn more about double penetration, or you plan to have it yourself. Rest assured that these 16 Double Penetration positions that we found, will be more than enough.  READ MORE

Enlightening And Educative Details About The Benefits Of Bondage (BDSM)

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Learn the Enlightening And Educative Details About The Benefits Of Bondage (BDSM). Bondage (BDSM) is becoming increasingly popular amongst many couples. This is mainly attributed to the fact that more couples are understanding its benefits. The couples who practice bondage are no longer termed to be immoral. Instead, they are nowadays considered to be daring and open minded. Here are some of the primary benefits of BDSM.

Enhances better communication

Couples who practice BDSM are able to communicate more effectively. Such couples are open with each other in different aspects of life for they know the sexual desires of each other. The couples are open to discussing almost anything for they have no secrets between them. This is an important aspect of any relationship because many relationships fail because there is no proper communication.

Increases intimacy

Practicing bondage is a perfect way of being sexually adventurous. Therefore, a couple that practices bondage increases intimacy consequently spicing the relationship. With bondage couples are able to move away from the monotonous ways of intimacy. These monotonous ways usually make the relationships boring for the couples get bored from doing the same thing over and over again. But with BDSM couples are able to experiment and such couples usually look forward to the intimate times.

Makes partners more faithful

Couples who practice bondage are more unlikely to cheat. This is mainly because bondage creates extra ordinary trust. When trust is improved the couples feel that they do not need to cheat for they are enjoying what they are getting from their partners. The couples usually do not have the courage to cheat for if they go to another person it will be hard to tell the person to practice BDSM. Furthermore, the partners feel obligated to stay faithful so as to encourage their partners to remain faithful.

Reduces anxiety

The couples who enjoy BDSM are also less likely to suffer from stress and anxiety. This is primarily because such couples feel that they are loved and as a result get more self esteem. With increased self esteem the couples are able to solve different issues in a more efficient manner. The fact that such couples share a lot of their issues plays a significant role in reducing stress. In addition the couples get to work out different issues together and this ensures the issues are solved fast.

Improves general health

BDSM is more demanding than ordinary ways of enjoying intimacy. As a result, the couples who practice bondage get to be more physical. This is an important aspect because being physical exercises the body and this can contribute even in weight loss. Therefore, the number of couples spicing their relationships through practicing bondage has been increasing steadily because more people are understanding the various benefits of bondage.

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swingLifeStyle.com

How to Be a Dominatrix

How to Be a Dominatrix

Swingers DatingAs you may already know, “Dominatrix” is a term used to describe a woman that is dominant, be it in a sexual or romantic relationship. Also referred to as a “mistress”, the dominatrix takes the leadership role during sexual intercourse as she dominates the man, who is commonly known as a “slave”. In this case, the man would be considered the submissive in the relationship and abiding by all the rules set by the dominatrix. The two mutually agree on the aspects that are to be controlled, and on the boundaries that ought to be respected.

People often engage in a dominant-submissive relationships because they have a strong urge to be dominated, humiliated (be it sexually, verbally or physically) or because they want to feel powerful. If you are thinking about becoming a dominatrix, here are the steps you need to take:

  1. Set Boundaries 

How to Be a DominatrixThe first and most important thing about being a dominatrix is to understand that there is a limit. Even when your submissive tells you to stop, part of the fun is not stopping and continuing with what you have to do. Some men get off when they feel pain or humiliation, but if you push it too far and you take your dominant side a mile further, this can break the trust and bond you have established with your submissive. Have a safe word that both parties agreed upon, before you start a dominating session. When you, as a dominatrix, hear the safe word – you need to stop what you are doing immediately!

  1. Don’t Be Afraid To Experiment 

Curiosity is perfectly normal, and people will want to experiment sooner or later in life. When engaging in a dominant-submissive relationship, there are many things you can experiment with, as the field of BDSM is quite complex. There are a few things you can try like mouth gags, restraints (handcuffs, ropes), blind folds that will prevent the slave from seeing what’s next, and you may even be interested in checking out some BDSM toys as well. Part of being a good dominatrix is giving pleasure. Both parties involved in a dominant-submissive relationship is supposed to experience pleasure, not just one party.

  1. Dress As A Dominatrix! 

In order to be a dominatrix, you must dress and act like one. However, it is extremely important to know where your role stops – contrary to popular belief, only a very small percentage of those who engage in a slave-master relationship actually play the role on a non-stop basis. While being a dominatrix is still considered as taboo in many countries, in some countries (especially in assigned districts) it is not uncommon to see dominant women walking their slaves down the street.

That being said, it is important to understand the “dress code” that applies to dominant women. You can choose to be on the classy side or you can choose to be on the rough, hardcore side with chains, whips and piercings. Your clothes should be dictated by the extent of your role, by your personality and allure and by your preferences. Generally speaking, dominant women like to wear leather or latex closed coupled with high heel How to Be a Dominatrixstilettos or boots and revealing undergarments.

  1. Role Play

Inside The World Of A Dominatrix shows how some women choose to become dominatrix. Some for fun and the sexual arousal, while others do it for money. Regardless of the reasons, it is very important to stay discrete with all the men (or women) that you meet for dominating sessions. People who engage in BDSM activities usually live perfectly normal and healthy lives, although some of the slaves may be carried away by the entire game and insist on getting more. This is why it is advised to set the boundaries and to avoid revealing personal information. Being a dominatrix is a role play done for pleasure, and that is how it should stay. Everybody has a private life and a public life, and one’s right to a private life should always be respected.

  1. Stay Open-Minded 

One of the most important characteristics of being a dominatrix is your mentality. Try to be as open-minded as possible. Never judge those you have interactions with (especially as a dominatrix), and never underestimate your slave as submissive parts can come from various backgrounds and they can have different academic training.

Want to know how to dominate a dominating woman? Try here: Top tips on dominating a dominant woman